What do you think about this. men’s wedding ring?
Saturday, December 13th, 2008 Subscribe To Our Feed
Okay, consider these details and let me know your thoughts:
1. We’ve been together for six years have lived together for 2.
2. He proposed on Aug. 1st and our wedding isn’t until 10/9/10 because we’re both working and we need to save up the money because both of our parents are broke.
3. We designed my ring out of two parts; the first band has a half caret heart-shaped diamond. The second band has four quarter-caret jewels, two diamonds and two pink sapphires. It fits around the heart so it looks like one row of jewels.
4. We agreed that the first band is my engagement ring and the second is the wedding ring. I offered it back to him to keep until the wedding but he wanted me to wear it.
5. Last night for his birthday, (in addition to many more of his favorite things) I put together a very sweet romantic proposal and gave him his 6mm 14 caret white gold band. The first thing he said was “Well, do you want me to wear it?” When I told him “Yes, I want you to wear it” he started talking about how he didn’t know if he was comfortable wearing it because we weren’t married yet, and it wasn’t traditional. He even suggested we look it up on the internet.
6. We’ve pretty much always said we were meant to be and have been emotionally married for a long time, even if we couldn’t afford a real wedding yet.
7. He later said that he would love to wear it and we should be what we’ve always been: unique. He only said that after he saw the heart-broken look on my face. I feel like he’s trying to humor me and a part of him isn’t ready to wear it yet, even though I wear his.
I feel like I should take it back. What do you think?
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December 14th, 2008 at 2:02 am
I think your reading too much into it. Just wear each others rings. He obviously saw the heartbroken look on your face and wants to make you happy. Don’t read too much into it. He is willing to wear it, and your willing to wear yours. There is no problem.
December 14th, 2008 at 8:11 pm
If I read this correctly……..sounds like he’s just feeling bad because you gave him a real nice, flashy ring, while the one he gave you was homemade.
“NJ”
December 15th, 2008 at 5:11 am
Most men have no desire to get an engagement ring. My husband doesn’t even wear his wedding ring (he can’t - he’s a pastry chef and his work is too messy, it would ruin the ring). If he doesn’t want to wear it, don’t make him. It doesn’t mean anything more then that.
December 16th, 2008 at 11:59 am
You don’t wear a wedding ring until you are married. Take your “wedding” ring off until you get hitched. Wait to put your fiance’s ring on his hand until the ceremony - you are acting and sounding kind of immature by wanting to look “married” before the event happens. Please grow up.
December 18th, 2008 at 4:10 pm
Us old people don’t get wearing the wedding bands before the wedding. Doesn’t matter if your living together or not, we don’t get it. We think the band is a symbol of a marriage, not of living together. We think it should be reserved until the wedding, and since it receives a blessing in a religious wedding, we think wearing it unblessed is pointless.
Someone else here was picking out a necklace for a fiancee who did not want to wear a ring, and the necklace of the same metal as her ring, since both are round, was what she decided on.
If you must mark fiancee as yours, and he does not want to wear the ring yet, I think most people would think that was ok, and finding an engagement present for him a good idea.
And if you are wearing your band, and not the engagement ring part, same thing. An engagement is a great time, fun, and you get lots of attention during it, why would you want to skip it, and wear a wedding ring now? Do you find the need to pretend you are married?
I have been reading her, and it seems that some think that because you buy the bands together, it is to give a choice as to which one to wear, no it is to make sure they match, and fit together. Sometimes the man’s ring is included in the set, but it is to make sure it too matches, not as an option to wear now.
Take it back, but not in anger. Just take it back to give to him on his wedding day. Evidently he does not see the need to wear it now.
and I would explore the “be what we have always been” comment, and see if he will be ready in 2010.
December 19th, 2008 at 9:59 pm
Well, he was right. The wedding band shouldn’t be worn until the wedding ceremony. It takes away the specialness of it.